Geoff's Story*
Step 1
Geoff discovered what mattered
Geoff (he/him) is a 41-year-old project manager and father of four who had been suffering in silence with pelvic pain for a decade. What began as tension in his pelvis had evolved into constant, debilitating pain in his testicles, perineum, scrotum, and anus, worse with sex. He was also experiencing erectile dysfunction and had to strain to empty his bladder. The pain was exacerbated by stress - and with a demanding job, four young children and no family support, stress was constant. He'd seen two urologists (being referred by the second one) and tried antibiotics and anti-inflammatories with no effect, leaving him feeling dismissed and hopeless. Working together, we discovered Geoff’s pelvic floor muscles were chronically tense and tender. Psychosocial questionnaires revealed stress and depression, significant fear of movement and deeply negative thoughts about his pain. He shared a history of adverse childhood experiences that had shaped his stress response and nervous system sensitivity.
Geoff's Pelvic Health Goals:
- Understand why I have this pain - I need to know it's not cancer or something serious they're missing.
- Sit through meetings at work without pain constantly distracting me and empty my bladder without straining.
- Feel confident to be intimate, stop avoiding sex, have pain-free erections and orgasms – and enjoy intimacy with my partner again.
- Play with my kids without pain making me irritable with them
- Get back to bike riding with my mates - it used to be my stress relief.
- Feel like myself again - not like a broken, miserable version of who I used to be.
Step 2
Geoff restored what mattered
Understanding that his pain didn't mean something was seriously wrong was transformative. Geoff embraced learning about pain science - how his nervous system had become sensitised, his pelvic floor muscles had learned protective tension, and his childhood trauma, stress, fear, and negative thoughts were amplifying his pain. Central to treatment was pelvic floor muscle relaxation training using biofeedback. Breathing exercises, mindfulness and stress management gave him tools to manage stress without it escalating into pain. Movement practices gradually reintroduced activity, showing his nervous system that movement was safe. Bladder retraining and relaxation techniques addressed his urinary emptying difficulties. As his pelvic floor tension reduced and stress management improved, his erectile function began to improve.
Step 3
Geoff enjoyed what mattered
After 13 months, Geoff had no scrotal, perineal, or anal pain. He was aware of what triggered his pelvic tension and had strategies to reduce it before it escalated. His bladder was working well, and his sexual function had significantly improved. He had returned to bike riding with friends and enjoying quality time with his children, feeling fully present and enjoying it.